Why you ought to believe!
Rabbi Brian Zachary Mayer
Religion-Outside-The-Box
Hi.
In a moment I will explain why I, Rabbi Brian, think it behooves you to have faith in Santa Claus.
A few explanations and promises before that:
- I will use only the most rational and logical of arguments.
- I promise I am not trying to convert you into a religious nut.
- There will be a quick biography so you get to know a little about this rabbi who is telling you to believe in Santa Claus.
- I will explain how Santa Claus is a metaphor for God – but I'm still sticking with convincing you to believe only in the former.
With love,
Rabbi Brian
A Quick Biography
I'm Rabbi Brian. I'm the guy who wrote this stuff that you are reading right now.
In a nutshell, this is my background:
- I grew up in NYC the child of capitalist, eccentric, Upper-West-Side (across the street from the Dakota) Reform Jews. I was 3½ years younger than my only sibling, my sister. I spent 12 years at the country's oldest, über-prestigious, all-boys Dutch Reformed Church school. (It is the oldest school in the nation – founded 1628 when "America" was still Dutch.) At the age of 18, I was taking flute, computer, tennis, Latin, French, basketball, and chess lessons. And I was in an interschool orchestra, was certified as a scuba diver, and performed magic at kid's parties. All that and I had traveled the world too.
- I entered Tufts University thinking I might become a mathematician and left having decided to devote my life to the spiritual. Later I did a 5-year-post graduate work in rabbinical school so I could learn everything I could about religion.
- At the age of 30, in 2000, I left mainstream Judaism to become the chief rabbi of Religion-Outside-The-Box a 501ce tax-exempt, non-denominational religious organization. (Donations, of course, gladly welcomed.)
- Now, I'm sitting in Valley Glen, California typing in my beautiful home office – the sun streaming through the window onto the my right side as I face south and the 21-inch monitor of my iMac G5. My two red-dogs are near me. My better half is working in her office.
- I think of my self as an artist – my main medium is religion and I'm nearing the end (God-willing) of the 5-year project of writing my first book.
This – what you are about to be reading – is part of a pre-release.
Santa Claus and God
The main thrust of this essay will be “why it behooves you to believe in Santa Claus.” But, as I mentioned above, I'm not just talking about good ol' St. Nick. I'm also talking about God.
I have found that people tend to have a lot more baggage when I mention the possibility of believing in God, so I stick with St. Nick.
(Also, there is something much more “man bites dog” about a “rabbi tells people to believe in Santa Claus.”)
Santa, in case you didn't know, is our American society's gentle way of talking about God.
The similarities between Santa and God are quite striking:
- Neither God nor Santa age or die. (Even their very existence is something of a mystery – which is pretty cool compared with ho-hum you and me.)
- Neither God nor Santa are limited by time or space as we are.
- Both have knowledge that is not-knowable – they know if you are bad and good and if you are sleeping or awake. (I find it very interesting that the twin questions: “Have you been bad or good?” and “Should you be rewarded for your behavior?” are both pretty much open for people to self evaluate.)
- Both metaphorically live “above us.” (Things that are above us – the north pole, Canada, the Sun, mountain-living, God – are almost always symbolical things that deserve reverence.)
- Santa and God each want to love people no matter the circumstances. Both are reported to be slow to anger and quick to forgive.
- Both have white beards and wear red-suits. (Well, not the later.) But with regard to the white beard – while we might “know better” than imagining God as an as older-white-men – it's what we do. (In fact, the early books of the bible portray God as bodily – iconoclasm came later. Also I just wanted to use the word iconoclasm.)
- Jews learn at an early age to not really believe in either. (This is part of a larger topic.) Many Jews learned the ridiculous concept that their religion is the “UN”-Christianity – so if Christians believe in the devil, heaven, or having a personal relationship with God, Jesus, or Santa, they as Jews aren't supposed to. (All three – and more – are incorrect and addressed further in my book.)
- Children alone are supposed to have believe in Santa and in God .
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Santa = God
- Above us.
- Omnipotence.
- Omniscience.
- Benevolence.
- Older-White Male.
- Not for Jews.
- Only for children.
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This last one is true, sad, and really important to understand. That children alone are supposed to believe.
There are consequences to this notion that children alone are supposed to have faith. It means that adults aren't.
An adult in American society is supposed to believe that asking either Santa or God for something does nothing more than a trick or fantasy of the mind would do. This makes complicit liars out of the many closeted, faith filled American workers. (This might help you might understand why the “religious” in this country might feel a bit angry. More on faith in the workplace .)
Also, children being the only ones with faith means adults associate witnessing magic in the world with being childlike – and it's not. Real faith and real religion are the birthright of anyone who has lived through the difficulties of life – something, thank God, most children do not experience.
A thought piece:
There is one other thing to think about that comes out of Santa being a metaphor for God:
Think about how the way your parents broke the news to you about Santa, (the tooth fairy, your favorite doll's demise in the washing machine, etc.) that is the way you were parented through some of the toughest of your life's moments at a tender age.
In this moment, now, you, as an adult, have the opportunity to re-parent yourself. You can now – in thinking back on how you as a little kid reacted to the truth – when you were told the truth about St. Nick, etc. – treat yourself not as you were treated then, but as you wish you were or how you wish to be treated now. What I am advising is that now you figure out how to safely mourn – if that's what you need to do – or scream. Of course, you can also hold on to your childhood trauma and use it as an excuse to justify bad behaviors now as an adult. I'd advise taking the time and effort to work through it and set yourself free. |
I have written the following to encourage you as an adults to consider becoming a believer...
Proving you ought to beleive
Now, using a mathematical, I will demonstrate that you – as an adult – ought to believe in Santa Claus.
Before I do, I would like to explain a little history to the proof that I am about to use. Blaise Pascal, a clever French mathematician, originated this proof to demonstrate that it would be better for people to believe in God. Note: Pascal's detractors said that there is a special place in hell for those who believe in God based on mathematics. (I have found no scriptural basic for this.)
To prove we ought to believe in Santa Claus, there are two suppositions to keep in mind:
- Supposition A: There is a St. Nick or there is no St. Nick.
- Supposition B: You believe or you don't believe.
Over supposition A, we have no control – either there is a real, jolly ol' St. Nick or there isn't. That's something over which we have no control.
On the other hand, there's supposition B, whether or not we believe in St. Nick. That's something we can choose. If you wanted to believe in St. Nick, it would be up to you, no? (Hey, if this rationalist 35-year-old rabbi can believe in St. Nick, I think you can, too.)
Now, let's look at the outcomes of each of the four possible scenarios:
Going around clockwise from the top left:
- There is a St. Nick, and you believe in St. Nick, congratulations, you will be rewarded. Not only with tangible gifts, but you also get the twinkle in your eye of a child who believes in magic and Tinkerbelle.
- There is a St. Nick, and you don't believe in him. Christmas Eve is only slightly different than Monday. St. Nick might put a new car in the driveway and you would think that it was your spouse who put it there. Miracles do not happen for you.
- There is no St. Nick, and you don't believe. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Maybe you'll die peacefully believing you were right.
- There is no St. Nick, but you believe. This is the clincher. Of course, you will get no more rewards or punishments than the people who don't believe in Santa. But when the random occurrences seem to you to be part of a grander scheme of things, you will be filled with a touch of childlike joy. When a something you have wanted comes true, you will be blissfully ignorant of what others call "reality.” For you, that there is a Santa Claus.
As the stakes are your own sense of happiness and joy in the world, you might as well believe in Santa and act as though Santa exists.
Let's look for a moment at the advantages to believing in Santa Claus, whether or not Santa exists. (And, whether or not your family and friends will laugh at you for believing.)
- Wishes come true! If you believe that Santa Claus will grant your wishes, you will on a regular basis request what you want. Any business person will tell you that writing out specific goals is one of the best ways to get what you want as it focuses the mind on what is important. (This is also the basis for “manifesting” – a downward trending, pseudo-science.)
- Hope. If you believe in Santa Claus, there is, even on the darkest days, something to look forward to.
- Love. If you believe in Santa Claus you get to walk around with the feeling that you are loved by an unconditional love. This love might give you the confidence you need or the strength to endure things you thought you couldn't endure.
- Magic. Miracles. Merriment . If you believe in Santa Claus you get to get part of a community of faith – an advantage of which is a youthful attitude and a sense of being in with the "in" crowd on a really big secret.
So, if you want that little twinkle in your eye, start believing. If you want that sense of feeling loved, start believing. If you want a sense of being a kid and we don't have to tell the grown-ups about this fun, start believing.
Belief always starts with being willing to believe. (Re-read that sentence if necessary and then open yourself up.)
If you don't want to, you don't have to. That's fine with me.
Unsolicited advice to parents:
Ponder your children's love of Christmas and God beyond the material getting stuff.
(I am not advocating lying to your children. Allow them their age appropriate understanding of their world.)
When they are at an age at which they are alright with you liking different foods than they do, they will also be alright with the fact that you have chosen live in this world with belief even if they have not. |
A rabbi confesses...
As an adult, I have chosen to believe.
Let me tell you a few things about my faith:
- My faith isn't always or steadfast, but hey, that's the nature of faith – if it were always or steadfast, it wouldn't be faith.
- I have compassion for the young adolescent part of me who protested much too wholeheartedly and refused to believe.
- I'd say my faith today is at about 70% of where it gets at it's all time best.
- I worry about being teased for my beliefs and about having less faith tomorrow than I have today.
- I am looking forward to the 25th day of the month and hoping to witness something magical which might again buoy my faith.
- Do not draw from my admission above that I've got a handle on that whole tooth fairy debacle.
With love,
Rabbi Brian – Santa's helper. |
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Final questions:
What do you really want? Can you fathom that whatever it is that you desire will be considered and given to you?
Does this freak you out? Make you angry or anxious? Other?
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